An example of ideas being
organised less effectively
Sample essay 3:'Tragedies
portray societies which are caught between conflicting value
systems.' Discuss with reference to one or more plays.
This is
a summary of the main ideas contained in each paragraph of the
essay.
Summary of
the introduction
Conflicting
value systems always exist. In the tragedies of Everyman, Dr.
Faustus and Hamlet there are different kinds of conflict
faced, including personal moral conflicts with individual characters
of the plays, and also opposing values of different characters.
Summary of
the main body of the essay
The central
character in Everyman faces moral dilemmas, such as whether or
not to go with Death. Everyman consists of dramatic conflict
and abstract argument (called psychomachia); this means that because
of all the conflicting value systems, the central character has to remain
strong in his mind in order to make the right decisions.
There are also
conflicting religious values in the play. Everyman is a Christian
play in which God is seen as manipulative and vengeful, though heaven
is seen as a good place. Also, members of the audience with other religious
beliefs might see God in different ways and not believe in heaven and
hell; Catholics would have certain views on repentance. This means that
the audience could see the whole play as having conflicting value systems.
The play shows
two conflicting value systems in the moral argument - we see what happens
when someone is tempted, and also when they make the right choices.
The other characters
also have conflicting value systems: the character of Vice is not a
typical representation of evil and so is experiencing conflicting personality
traits.
The central
character in Dr. Faustus also experiences temptation and moral
conflict; the Good and Bad Angels both advise him. Mephistopheles also
creates conflict by doing Faustus' bidding. The society in which Faustus
lives is split into people telling him different things (such as the
Old Man); it is hard for him to make the right decisions.
As with Everyman,
there are also conflicts in audience interpretations of Dr. Faustus.
There was a lot of religious change during the period; Catholics and
Protestants would have different views on Faustus' damnation.
Hamlet
also has many conflicting values. Hamlet faces moral dilemmas
and conflict in his own mind. He has two parts to his character which
are conflicting: he is torn between doing what he thinks is right and
taking revenge on his father's killer. He pretends to be mad to try
and escape his conscience - he hopes that it will make others forgive
him for Claudius' murder. Hamlet finally kills himself to escape
the conflicting value systems around him.
Summary of
the conclusion
Tragedies have
conflicts for many reasons - more often than not these are personal
rather than in society. However, societies influence the actions which
those persons take. Also, the characters who are faced with moral dilemmas
find it hard to sort out the conflicting opinions from the society around
them. However, the tragedy does not always mean that evil wins out:
sometimes good triumphs.
Q. How could this
be improved?
TUTOR'S REPLY
There are some interesting ideas
and interpretations offered in this essay, but they are not ordered in a structured
way; they seem to appear somewhat randomly. It is difficult to follow a clear
train of thought or argument in this essay - the statement contained in the
essay question does not seem to be addressed. The ideas and interpretations
need to be placed within a more evident framework, so that a clear line of
thought emerges. For example, it could be productive to identify common themes
(e.g. the conflicting pressures which the central protagonist experiences
from those around him) and structure the essay around these, rather than discussing
each text consecutively and without direct comparison to the others. An initial
explanation of what is understood by 'conflicting value systems' might also
help structure the essay more effectively.