An example of ideas being organised less effectively

Sample essay 3: 'Tragedies portray societies which are caught between conflicting value systems.' Discuss with reference to one or more plays.

This is a summary of the main ideas contained in each paragraph of the essay.

Conflicting value systems always exist. In the tragedies of Everyman, Dr. Faustus and Hamlet there are different kinds of conflict faced, including personal moral conflicts with individual characters of the plays, and also opposing values of different characters.

The central character in Everyman faces moral dilemmas, such as whether or not to go with Death. Everyman consists of dramatic conflict and abstract argument (called psychomachia); this means that because of all the conflicting value systems, the central character has to remain strong in his mind in order to make the right decisions.


There are also conflicting religious values in the play. Everyman is a Christian play in which God is seen as manipulative and vengeful, though heaven is seen as a good place. Also, members of the audience with other religious beliefs might see God in different ways and not believe in heaven and hell; Catholics would have certain views on repentance. This means that the audience could see the whole play as having conflicting value systems.


The play shows two conflicting value systems in the moral argument - we see what happens when someone is tempted, and also when they make the right choices.


The other characters also have conflicting value systems: the character of Vice is not a typical representation of evil and so is experiencing conflicting personality traits.


The central character in Dr. Faustus also experiences temptation and moral conflict; the Good and Bad Angels both advise him. Mephistopheles also creates conflict by doing Faustus' bidding. The society in which Faustus lives is split into people telling him different things (such as the Old Man); it is hard for him to make the right decisions.


As with Everyman, there are also conflicts in audience interpretations of Dr. Faustus. There was a lot of religious change during the period; Catholics and Protestants would have different views on Faustus' damnation.


Hamlet also has many conflicting values. Hamlet faces moral dilemmas and conflict in his own mind. He has two parts to his character which are conflicting: he is torn between doing what he thinks is right and taking revenge on his father's killer. He pretends to be mad to try and escape his conscience - he hopes that it will make others forgive him for Claudius' murder. Hamlet finally kills himself to escape the conflicting value systems around him.

Tragedies have conflicts for many reasons - more often than not these are personal rather than in society. However, societies influence the actions which those persons take. Also, the characters who are faced with moral dilemmas find it hard to sort out the conflicting opinions from the society around them. However, the tragedy does not always mean that evil wins out: sometimes good triumphs.

Q. How could this be improved?

TUTOR'S REPLY

There are some interesting ideas and interpretations offered in this essay, but they are not ordered in a structured way; they seem to appear somewhat randomly. It is difficult to follow a clear train of thought or argument in this essay - the statement contained in the essay question does not seem to be addressed. The ideas and interpretations need to be placed within a more evident framework, so that a clear line of thought emerges. For example, it could be productive to identify common themes (e.g. the conflicting pressures which the central protagonist experiences from those around him) and structure the essay around these, rather than discussing each text consecutively and without direct comparison to the others. An initial explanation of what is understood by 'conflicting value systems' might also help structure the essay more effectively.

An example of ideas being organised more effectively
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